Dick Gets a Heart

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Dick Cheney

The Dickster received a heart transplant. This surprised everyone who thought he had no heart to begin with. Sorry, couldn’t resist.

With the usual disclaimer — I hope he recovers quickly, etc. — wow, is this news snark bait, or what?

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24 Comments

24 Comments

  1. Amanda  •  Mar 24, 2012 @10:45 pm

    Hmm, I wonder what the person who donated that heart would think about it going to one of the most despised men alive.

  2. biggerbox  •  Mar 24, 2012 @10:58 pm

    Snark bait, you say? All right, I’ll bite.

    How about, Let’s hope this will keep him alive long enough to end up in the dock at the Hague.

    or, Guess he found a surgeon just as unconcerned as he was about whether the heart should go to a younger person who could do more with it.

    or maybe, I hope the new one doesn’t fight as hard to get out as the old one did.

    OK, that should be enough to hold me for a while.

  3. Swami  •  Mar 24, 2012 @11:30 pm

    He’s trying to cheat the Grim Reaper like he cheated the American people. All his poison has been spent so he must go to the grave.

  4. Kyle  •  Mar 25, 2012 @12:29 am

    Bush is still on the waiting list for a brain.

  5. justme277  •  Mar 25, 2012 @3:16 am

    Sorry, don’t think this is too funny. He only got a new heart because of the all the blood money he has made off of the suffering of others. The only comfort this brings me is that, as bigger box said, he may still live long enough to end up in the hague where he belongs.

    Dont even bother to tell me that there was not a better medical candidate for the heart and tonight a family SUFFERS because someone they love, who has most likely never committed crimes against humanity , got passed by so “dick” could have a heart..It makes me want to puke.

    I WAS an organ donor , until tonight. THIS changed my mind.

    I would be rolling over in my grave to think they gave my heart( or any organ) to someone like that. So when you need a kidney and you can’t have mine you can thank “dick” for making that possible. He totally changed my mind about organ donation being a good thing.The last thing I would ever want to do as a donor would be to end up in someone who would continue to make others suffer for his profit. I COULD NEVER rest in peace thinking I helped someone live so they could destroy more life.

    I say SHAME on dick for taking it.And I don’t care if anyone likes that or not. Don’t tell me there isnt someone younger, in better health who would have been a better candidate. Shame on the doctor who wasted a heart that some grieving family was good enough to give for the gift of life so this jerk could maybe have a few more years when someone else who has 40 or 50 years left does without.

    May his God have more pity and forgiveness for this man than I do.

  6. Bill Bush  •  Mar 25, 2012 @5:47 am

    I think it was an implant, not a transplant.

  7. c u n d gulag  •  Mar 25, 2012 @6:51 am

    I’m sure they were very careful about who was on the surgical team.
    No Liberals/Democrats/Atheists/Muslims – only good, Conservative Christian doctors and nurses for Dastardly Dick Cheney.

    This got me to thinking – on my drivers license, I’m listed as an organ donor.
    I wonder if I can specify that, when I die, should anyone want one of my poor, abused, organs, that they/it NOT go to a Conservative?

    After all, a new heart can’t fix a diseased soul.
    New cornea’s won’t make them see suffering.
    Etc…

  8. c u n d gulag  •  Mar 25, 2012 @7:10 am

    I am told that the transplanted heart is, indeed, human.

    In which case, this may be the first time a heart rejects the body.

  9. Swami  •  Mar 25, 2012 @7:25 am

    The blood of a million Iraqis calls out from the grave for vengeance.

  10. c u n d gulag  •  Mar 25, 2012 @7:50 am

    WAAAAAAY OT:
    But a great, great column from Frank Bruni.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2012/03/25/opinion/sunday/bruni-a-catholic-classmate-rethinks-his-religion.html?pagewanted=2&_r=2&hp

    Warning: In April, the NY Times, in its infinite wisdom, will limit internet access to 10 articles, before you’ll need to pay.

  11. maha  •  Mar 25, 2012 @9:45 am

    I actually bit the bullet and took a digital subscription to the Times, so if you ever run out of “free” views and want to read something, let me know and I’ll link to it. The way it’s been working (unless they’ve changed it) is that if you get to an article through a link from another site, like from a blog, you can read the article even if you’re over your limit.

  12. maha  •  Mar 25, 2012 @11:12 am

    Thanks for the Frank Bruni link. Re the anecdote at the end — I remember many years ago reading an interview with a doctor who performed abortions, and she always talked to all patients before she did the procedure. And she said she got so tired of women who started the interview with “I’m not one of those women who get abortions …” that the doctor would refuse to do the procedure if they said that. She’d say “OK, then I guess there’s no reason for you to be here,” and show them the door.

  13. Swami  •  Mar 25, 2012 @8:28 am

    He’s got to feed off the dead in order to live. Just like a vulture!

  14. Lynne  •  Mar 25, 2012 @8:47 am

    According to a nurse friend, he had the operation done at the same place Steve Jobs went for liver transplants. $$$$$

  15. c u n d gulag  •  Mar 25, 2012 @9:00 am

    Back OT – Top 10 reasons why Dastardly Dick Cheney got a heart transplant:

    http://welcomebacktopottersville.blogspot.com/2012/03/top-ten-reasons-why-dick-cheney-got.html

  16. c u n d gulag  •  Mar 25, 2012 @10:20 am

    Thanks, maha! 🙂

  17. c u n d gulag  •  Mar 25, 2012 @11:29 am

    Yes, that was a hell of an ending to his column.

    And that’s where that doctor’s a better person than I am.
    Because I would have walked right up to that woman, and said, “Hi! Boy, am I glad I caught you! I forgot to give you a receipt for the abortion you had last Tuesday at 10:45 am. I hope the other ladies here didn’t miss you too much that day? Or more likely, a couple of days. Well, ladies, did you miss her? Oh, here’s your receipt.”

    The problem with too many of these ““I’m not one of those women who get abortions…” is that they either don’t realize, or are not empathetic or smart enough to understand, that most other women are also part of the same, “I’m not one of those women who get abortions…” tribe.

    It’s always, “Those skanky sluts (especially the non-white ones) are having sex all of the time and all over the place! But I (or my daughter) am pregnant due to an accident.”

  18. c u n d gulag  •  Mar 25, 2012 @11:41 am

    One more thought – what ever happened to “The Golden Rule?”
    And, “There, but for the grace of God, go I…”?

    I always thought those were two of the best rules to live my life by.

    And where did this modern day interpretation of Jesus as Rambo come from?
    That’s pretty modern, isn’t it?
    I know fire-an-brimstone have been around for a long, long, time.
    Can this all be traced back to “The Book of Revelation?”
    Though baptized, I’m no practicing Christian – can someone more religious than I am help me out?
    Where did the “turn the other cheek” Jesus, revert (convert?) back to the old Abrahamic/Hammurabic, “An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth?”

  19. Iosue  •  Mar 25, 2012 @11:47 am

    Keep Cheney alive longer so he can go to trial at the Hague– where he, and several others in the Bush administration, belong.

  20. donnah  •  Mar 25, 2012 @11:57 am

    Stealing this from another post:

    “Dick Cheney’s doctors made medical history today when they managed to fit a human heart into an asshole.”

  21. Lynne  •  Mar 25, 2012 @12:20 pm
  22. c u n d gulag  •  Mar 25, 2012 @12:32 pm

    Lynne,
    Thanks!
    And ZOINKS!!!

  23. Swami  •  Mar 25, 2012 @1:00 pm

    May his heart go the way of Rasputin’s penis.

  24. muldoon  •  Mar 25, 2012 @3:35 pm

    I was going to say that Cheney’s doctors had to remove his old heart because it was black and gangrenous, but I fear I am too late to the party. Everybody here already came up with better ones.



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