Truce, Shmoose

If it weren’t for the fact it was released on al Jazeera, I’d wonder if the new bin Laden tape hadn’t been fabricated in the White House basement. The last time we heard from him, I believe, was on the eve of the 2004 elections. And here he is again, just when Georgie needs a diversion from this little Fourth Amendment problem.

On the tape, bin Laden suggests a truce in Iraq. To which I say, whoop-di-doo. Only 7 percent of the people we’re fighting in Iraq are affiliated with al Qaeda, according to authoritative sources, and we don’t know how many of the 7 percent actually take orders from bin Laden. Osama’s talkin’ out of his butt, says I.

Our little altercation in Afghanistan may have started out as a conflict between al Qaeda and supporters versus Afghan freedom fighters with western military support. And the scuffle in Iraq may have been conceived as one between BushCo and anti-western Islamic terrorism. But it seems to me that the violence in both countries is spinning out of control and is in the hands of more conflicting factions than you can shake a kufie at. It’s way past the point where two sides can shake hands and make a deal, even if they both wanted to. We’re not in control over there, but neither is Osama bin Laden.

I’m not sayin’ that’s the way I want it. That’s just the way it is.

Osama says he is preparing new attacks on the U.S., which isn’t exactly a big surprise, either.

ObL wanted to talk to Americans because increasing numbers of Americans want to pull out of Iraq. Naturally this touched off fury among the die hards of the Right who believe ObL is the real mastermind behind For an example of crushing non-logic, check out this post. Osama says most Americans would be willing to leave Iraq. says most Americans would be willing to leave Iraq. The blogger lets this astonishing coincidence stand on its own, as if it self-evidently proved something.

I got news for you, toots; a majority of Americans think invading Iraq was a mistake and think we ought to be working real hard at getting out. That’s what polls say. Facts is facts.

If both Osama bin Laden and George W. Bush remark that the sky is blue, what does that tell us? (a) ObL and GWB are secretly in cahoots, or (b) the sky is blue.

Work on it, son.

Whether today’s message has any real significance, or whether it’ll prove to be something the Right will wank over for a while and then forget … well, your guess is as good as mine. Is there anything we should be doing differently because of this tape? Possibly beefing up security in major cities, but given the general waste of space the Department of Homeland Security seems to be, the cities are on their own. There’s no meaningful hope for a truce, unfortunately.

22 thoughts on “Truce, Shmoose

  1. “If it weren’t for the fact it was released on al Jazeera, I’d wonder if the new bin Laden tape hadn’t been fabricated in the White House basement. ”

    Maha, what makes you think the Bush administration has no inside connections to Al-Jazeera? Through their hand-holding friends the Saudis, perhaps? Wait! Isn’t Osama a member of the Saudi Royal family?

    I thought the timing odd, too. Who knows? Maybe he likes the current administration. I would if I were him.

    Ok. Doffing tin foil hat. Will sit at desk and be good for the rest of the day.

  2. Maha, what makes you think the Bush administration has no inside connections to Al-Jazeera?

    Um, he wants to bomb them?

  3. Well, it certainly provides a great excuse to continue spying illegally on Americans, doesn’t it?

  4. 1. I think bin Laden knows Bush better than we do, knows just how to provoke Papa Bush’s bad boy.

    2. The sky is not blue. It just looks that way.

  5. Well, it certainly provides a great excuse to continue spying illegally on Americans, doesn’t it?

    You got that right, Lynne. How conveinent that Osama should issue threats now…It’s just what Georgie needed.

  6. Yeah Bluto, the shallow mind that it is, like trying to seduce a date with a dog turd sandwich.
    But seriously, OBL “seems” to pop up at just the right time like some evil jack-in-the box.
    Better to keep an eye on the deepening Abramoff/ Gingrich/Netanyahu/Cheney/Delay fiasco as it approaches critical mass. Let the spooks take of any OBL threat real or fabricated.
    And don’t forget to check that tire pressure….

  7. Yo Bluto…If you want to be seducing me to your blog, mate, you might try incorporating some sexual fantasy on your pages because I don’t respond to political fantasy. I commend you on your “Guess who’s coming to dinner” piece,I’m always astounded when I read the works of profound thinkers. It shivers me timbers.

  8. There ya go, Swami! I’m so glad you’re reading and learning.

    If you keep sweet-talking me like that I’ll have to post a pic that doesn’t crop out my package. Just for you.

    And erinyes; I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but, well…just by visiting the blog of a Sith Master, you’ve attracted surveillance from the ACLU and I’ve seen their file on you (bribed Michael Moore with a meatloaf sandwich) – I’ll be honest, the mullet just doesn’t look that good on you.

  9. I’m sorry, I think this is totally fabricated. Bad news for Bush? Trot out Osama binBoogieman. OBL loves Saudis, chickengeorge loves Saudis. Iron clad proof that they are in cahoots.
    Now, I am a great thinker among the wingnuts. I just have to work on being scared all of the time, and then I can join the club.

  10. Well swab the poop deck and hoist my jib.
    Bluto don’t like the mullet…..
    Bluto the blowfish…oooh, that would make for a great cartoon!
    O.K. enough of the kindie garten stuff.
    Think for a moment, if the OBL tape IS real, if the cave man IS a true danger and pulls off another hit in the U.S. what that would mean. Cancel mid term elections? Impose martial law? Jail all dissidents for sedition? Expand the war in Iraq to Lebanon, Syria, Iran, Saudi?
    In one swipe of the sword, the world as we know it would be profoundly changed.
    See Justin Raimondo today at
    Oh Bluto, in case you havent noticed….
    Sith is an anagram…rearrange the letters sweetie pie….
    This is George Lucas” little joke”.

  11. I would not be one bit suprised if the bin laden tape was not manufactured by the white house,,,it would not be the first time bin laden has been on the US payroll.
    Our government has a bad habit of keeping poor company , Like when our CIA trained bin laden in the first place, to fight in the afghan war, or when rummy was over shaking hands with saddam.
    Given the track record of the Government would it suprise anyone,really,outside rightie world to find this was a set up?
    Doesn’t it seem even a little funny our government allowed us to see that tape right away instead of first screening it for possible messages to sleeper cells?Doesn’t it seem a bit odd our government was so fast to confirm, it was indeed bin laden on the tape, did they fly to al-jazeer and get the orginal tape for review? How is it possible to conduct testing so quick?
    How many people did the NSA catch in their net yesterday , thru people asking friends over the phone if they had heard of the new bin laden tape? Someone once told me believe nothing you hear and only half what you see,,thinking back on it now, I wonder how the person could have ever foreseen the bush years.

  12. Please people, I love a good conspiracy theory as much as anybody. It would be fun to spend this day speculating about it, but we’ve got work to do. The Alito vote was delayed just to give us a chance to be heard in Washington. I understand the Senators’ phones are ringing off the hook, in spite of the fact that the media have moved on from the story. The American Resistance continues its work no matter what’s on tv.

  13. Could someone as cold and calculating as Cheney put an American city on the chopping block to plunge us into a police state?…hmmmm. Thing is now the reaction would be different. A whole lot of people would be asking why we didn’t prepare more adequatly. No unsuspecting dupes here like the first time, our “daddy” party would be called to the mat for why they didn’t make us safe after we spend years having to undress just to board a plane.

  14. One other thing on the bin laden tape that just seems weird is the new “Bin laden book club” , it makes me wonder, has he been watching oprah????

    And how is it this guy can go to his local Barnes and noble to shop for western books , yet we can’t find him? Yes, it sounds like the guy is “on the run” (with time to shop for books of course). Or did he get it thru I guess that would blow the hell out of the cave theory as I am pretty sure that would be out of fed-ex’s delivery area.

    I am hoping Bin laden picks a classic next time.Perhaps he will tell us all to read a great work of fiction called the US constitution next.
    Bush while on vacation last summer, was reading a book about SALT,,,,SALT!!!!!!(geez) We can only guess whether or not he finished it. How bad is it when bin laden has a smarter reading list then the (cheer) leader of the “free” world?…SALT people! (snorts)….

  15. Perhaps, Bluto.Whatever floats yer boat Mate. I don’t much care for the dems.
    You , on the other hand are rather amusing….
    In an organ grinders’ monkey sort of way…

  16. Have you noticed how the news of the tape is presented on TV. It was an audio tape, but when they play the tape they show pictures of Osama talking.

  17. I say let the terrorist all strap a bomp up their ass and blow themselves up and take as many of their on kind with them. Osama is brain washing all the ignorant youth that 20 virgins are waiting for them, he didnt tell them they are all gay men waitiing for some young stuff. Osama is a coward hiding in the rocks. I say we will have a great celebration once he is dead.

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