Two Questions

So I stop keeping track of the news for a couple of days, and now Syria and Egypt Israel [sorry, shouldn’t blog before coffee] are trying to get into a war with each other. When will people learn to behave when I’m not keeping an eye on them?

Elsewhere, I see that some genius affiliated with the NRA is advising parents to store their home defense arsenal in their childrens’ rooms. The reason for this is that parents will naturally run their when gangs of Bad People break into their homes to murder them. What could possibly go wrong?

20 thoughts on “Two Questions

  1. Welcome back, maha!

    Well, we should certainly be thankful to George W. Bush for making the Middle East more stable, right?

    As for that idiot at the NRA Convention, who said that the best place for parents to store their guns is in their children’s room, since, instinctively, they’ll rush into those rooms anyway if there’s a “home invasion,” I say “BULLY!” to that idea!!!

    Nope, nothing can go wrong there…
    Oh, yeah, the guns are supposed to be stored in some safe there.
    And, yeah again, nothing can go wrong there…

    And btw, whuddup with that term – “home invasion?”
    What ever happened to the simple term, “break-in?”
    Or “robbery?”
    Now, it’s an “invasion” of your “home?”

    Armed troops are coming to invade, demolish your pill-box, and establish secure ground – in, what, your feckin’ living room?

    Who the feck talks like that?

    And where the feck do they live, that it’s not some poor drunk, or drug-addled loser, breaking-in, thinking everyone’s gone, or asleep – but armed gang forces, with leaders like Ike, landing at the Normandy Beach that’s your feckin’ living room?

    Sweet Jayzoos H. Keeeeeeeerist!

    We need to openly mock and ridicule these people’s language!!!

    “Honey, when the home invasion eventually comes because we can’t both stay awake 24 hours a day, at the first sign of our home being invaded, when the enemy forces land, you distract those enemy forces by tearing off your shirt, showing them your titties, and I’ll rush off to the kid’s rooms, open up the safe’s, and gather our weapons so we can set-up a perimeter, and some cross-fire.
    We’ll practice that tomorrow night.
    Oh, and remember – I booby-trap the couch in front of our precious LED TV before I go to bed every night, so, first thing in the morning, before the kids wake up, one of us has to disable it.”

    ‘Yeah, ok, General Rommel, whatever you say.’

    And what does one say if the “home invasion” is successful, and you’re forced to “retreat?”
    “I shall return?”

    Feckin’ idjits! The whole feckin’ lot of ‘em!!!

  2. I love how Dumbya set us up for more and more years of the progress of Democracy. I cannot imagine people going to his library. I have to stay away from things that raise my blood pressure. Just thinking about it reminds me I have not taken my pill for the day. I’m going to the shelter to walk some dogs.

  3. I cannot believe how stupid the “advised parents” are. This is not a case of a lack of critical thinking skills, this is a complete lack of common sense, which is not all that common.

    This is more like entering the free way by using the ‘off ramp.’

  4. Clearly, the big risk in that NRA scenario is that the startled child will use his personal Cricket firearm to fire a few rounds into the parents as they rush in, leaving them unable to help defend the home against the dreaded invaders.

    Speaking of blogging before coffee, I assume you meant the parents would “naturally run there”?

  5. The point is – not enough people are keeping (buying) a “home defense arsenal.”

    Mr. LaPierre as much as told us that sales were the reason for NRA’s existance when he whined that criminals wouldn’t buy if they had to submit to background checks.

    Looks like that whole man-card and gun-gasm sales approach has a limited appeal so it’s time to go for the protective heroes.

  6. I assume you meant the parents would “naturally run there”?

    Stupid homonyms! Eye haight them sew much!

  7. It would MUCH safer for gun nuts if they just didn’t reproduce. That way, instead of giving mere children the most defensible room in the house, they could hunker down there all the time.

  8. Well, when the alarm goes off and the dog is barking and your home invaders are still determined to get into your house. You’ve got serious problems. Maybe it’s the liberal in me, but I would figure that these aren’t your run of the mill home invaders and there might be something I did to trigger such an aggessive home invasion. Did I pay all my drugs debts? Did I turn State’s evidence against a drug kingpin? Did I refuse an offer I shouldn’t have refused?

  9. I noticed the “home invasion” thangy a few years ago. Clearly *someone* needed to ramp up the fear.

  10. I’m willing to bet that 9 out of “home invasions” are carried out by S.W.A.T. teams.
    I’ve heard the righties say soldiers won’t turn their guns on citizens.Well, the local police certainly will ! and don’t even get me started on “four dead in O-hi-O” national guard.If ordered to fire, they will.

    Everybody knows the best place to hide yer shootin’ iron is the bathroom.For obvious reasons.

  11. On the home defense guy…

    “And if I’m going to go to the kid anyway, and I have an extra gun and an extra safe, why not put it in their closet?”

    And the audience isn’t bright enough to realize this is a guy who sells guns and gun safes.. so it only makes sense (to the salesman) to have guns and gun safes in every room. Even a dumb fish notices the hook – not this crowd!

    I’m the gun kook Maha tolerates – but the motive is way beyond transparent here.

  12. Even a dumb fish notices the hook – not this crowd!

    Of course not, Doug…They’re a bunch of primed rubes..If the Home Defense Expert title of the salesman didn’t give them a clue that they were being sold a bill of goods then there’s no hope for them. I’m sure nobody asked the guy how many home defense fire fights he had to his credit. Unless he was wearing an NRA home Defense campaign ribbon with several oak leaf clusters then he’s just another bag of hot air.

  13. In the animal kingdom it’s not uncommon in many species for the male to risk sacrificing themselves to draw a predator away from a nest/ den/ home in order to protect their young. I’d suppose that with conservatives that naturally instilled heroics doesn’t apply, and the inclination to endanger their children by drawing a threat closer to them seems to be the accepted practice.

  14. Ok so here is the deal on Israel: I heard a couple of giant biker dudes give the perfect metaphor just the other day as they described a mutual friend who is a much smaller guy. The smaller guy goes out drinking with the giants, they mingle and before to long the small guy has picked a fight and now expects the giants to, as they put it” Back his silly ass up”- Do you see where this is going? Couldn’t we just once not set our beers down and go bail their sorry asses out when they start crap they can’t finish? Could we at least let em get dragged out to the parking lot and roughed up a bit to teach them to stop picking fights before we go stepping in?…

    To me, it’s one thing if crap finds you- when all else fails you have no choice but to stand sometimes, but to go out on the world stage and START it? I am starting to think they have a “I need attention complex” when they feel ignored because the world has real problems. I give Israel 2 rolled up news papers! Bad!

    Now on to the guns: The Des Moines register had an exclusive report about the change to our concealed carry laws two years ago: The headline ” 50 registered sex offenders have concealed carry permits LEGALLY!”. You can read the article on line. It includes a photo of one sex offender who bragged he never leaves the house without his gun. The photo and his story are the poster child for gun control.

    The NRA should change their slogan to the only good kid is a dead kid. WHY they are not protecting their future customer base is beyond me. I am not sure what they have against children but it seems to be more of a war on them then a culture war to me. Their pride was sickening in the faces of the victims of Sandy Hook , ect. Have they no shame?

    And I remind you last weekends little pow wow comes on the heals of a survey that suggested 44% of republicans feel that a armed revolution may be needed in the next few years. To me that feels very much like a threat to our elected government and that is disturbing on every level.

    One more piece of local news from my neck of the woods. If you read the article in the Des Moines Register you may see a story about a shooting at a local strip club. It is 7 blocks from where I live. A large crowd of 300 people gathered in the parking lot at 2:30 am , including police who were called when the crowd spilled into the parking lot of a business a block up and closed off all the exits in and out. In the middle of that , some responsible gun owner fired his gun. The bullets hit two people, killing one. NO ONE SAW A THING. Someone fired a gun in a small parking lot crowded with 300 people , including police and no one saw a thing.Concealed carry permits for everyone!!! Thanks Iowa!

  15. Hey also, on the gun subject. From the headlines: NRA honors it’s youngest lifetime member age 3! It breaks your heart no?

  16. “NRA honors it’s youngest lifetime member age 3! It breaks your heart no?” Better collect those dues fast– I suspect NRA members cut 6-10 years off their average life expectancy.

  17. I have to be excruciatingly fair to the gun nuts.

    Here are the rules for how to handle an actual home invasion:

    Everyone goes to the same room, preferably a room with good visibility and only one entrance. You call the police, and use your firearm to protect the doorway. You will do *nothing* unless someone comes in that door. You wait for the police to come, and, if necessary, clear your building of intruders.

    It is not unwise to make the gathering room the children’s room, and, if you have a proper gun safe, the kids can’t get in it.

    Now, fairness completed: when I was a child, I once practiced grabbing squirt bottles of shampoo to blind any attacker who came at me while I was in the shower.

    Why would an attacker come at me in the shower? Hey, I was a *child* with a fair diet of superhero and action stories.

    Prepping for a home invasion is not too far from grabbing shampoo bottles to be sure you can squirt soap in an attacker’s eyes. You’re planning against an event that is vanishingly unlikely to happen, and making a fuss over it is stupid.

    If that person doesn’t have a firedrill plan for his family, he’s an idiot. But if he does, and also has a home invasion plan, he’s not an idiot – assuming he understands that the former is one or more orders of magnitude more likely to be necessary than the latter.

  18. I will stick with my bic— and a can of hairspray. The last thing any two bit “home invader” wants is a to face a mean middle aged woman with a improvised flame thrower that will melt their gun to the bone in their hand.That said as long as they left my pets and the Harley alone, I think I would save the hairspray and just let em have the rest.

    Ironically enough, I have the same plan for a fire- minus the hairspray and bic.

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